The Contemptible MPs Wanting To Bring Back Boris Johnson: They Must Lose Their Seats

 

I must admit, I didn’t think Liz Truss and the tyranny of the talentless that surrounds the former Prime Minister would last until Thursday lunchtime.

“Talentless?”, scream the few outraged Tories that are still brave enough to declare their unequivocal support for the crestfallen Truss. 

Yes, talentless. 

James Cleverly, the Foreign Secretary, is talentless. If stupidity was a talent Cleverly would score full marks, every time. 

Grant Shapps, the new Home Secretary, is talentless. If making up pseudonyms to sell shit on the internet was a talent, Shapps would have a golden turd-shaped medal hanging around his neck. 

Therese Coffey, the Secretary of State for Health and Social Care, and the Deputy Prime Minister, is talentless. If getting a top job in government simply for being a close friend of the idiot in office was a talent, Coffey would park her backside on a platinum throne and spark up a big Cuban cigar in celebration of her unrivalled talent.

Jacob Rees-Mogg, the Secretary of State for Business, Energy and Industrial Strategy, is talentless. If selling pills that cause an abortion while preaching how terrible you think abortion is was a talent, Rees-Mogg would still be an utterly despicable, soulless twat

Talentless. 

If you took the Conservative party 2019 - 2022 and turned it into a film script it would be widely rejected for being too far-fetched. 

But we really are about to have yet another Tory Prime Minister foisted upon us - the third in just three years - and the second without the mandate of a general election victory in the space of a couple of months.

The oceanic depth of the division in Tory party is undoubtedly entertaining. Watching the politicians that you despise metaphorically kicking the shit out of each other day after day has a certain appeal that is hard to put into words. 

Think about it for a moment… If you take out the period of compulsory mourning for the late Queen and the party conference season it seems Liz Truss only really governed for just twelve days, and eighty-eight seconds of that was spent delivering her resignation statement.

I’ve had minor chest infections last longer than Liz Truss, but to her eternal credit she did manage to bury the Queen, the economy, and the Conservative party in the space of just six weeks. 

Surprisingly, you’re not going to have to wait long for the fifth Conservative Prime Minister in office in just six years, despite them receiving less votes than a Strictly Come Dancing contestant. 

Will somebody think of Larry the cat? 

So what is left of this Conservative coalition of the corrupt, the cronies, and the carnival barkers? 

I don’t think it really matters who the Tories pick, whether it’s Sunak, Mordaunt, or even the loathsome polyp on the anus of humanity that is Boris Johnson. 

Sure, it certainly matters what policy direction the new Prime Minister decides to follow, but can we really see it making any difference to the Tories electoral fortunes? 

I think we have finally reached the point where the official opposition could be made up of faulty toasters and broken paving slabs and the Tories would still get obliterated at the next election.

The bar to replace Truss has been set incredibly low. The Tory membership still believe their best chance of electoral success is in the hands of the disgraced compulsive liar, Boris Johnson. 

The Tory membership thought the same about Liz Truss a couple of months ago, and her greatest achievement - apart from systematically destroying the Conservatives - was becoming the answer to the question, “who was the shortest ever serving British Prime Minister?”, in a pub quiz. 

So, let’s move on to a potential replacement. 

By the time you read this it could be a very different picture to the one I am seeing at the time of writing, but this will not distract from the shameful fact that scores of corrupt hard-right Conservative MPs believe the morally deficient Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson is the right person to take over from the clusterfuck Truss. 

Hasn’t that first class c**t Johnson done enough damage already? The man that promoted a sex pest?

Johnson is an elitist thug, a bully, a philanderer, and a racist, and I couldn’t give one single shit if Zelensky thinks cash machine Johnson is the second coming of the Lord. 

So let’s get on to the list that was up-to-date as of Saturday 11pm. I will try and update it in due course.

I think it is only right that we name and shame the Johnson enablers. Their constituents need to know what they will be voting for at the next general election.

You’ve probably not even heard of half of these brainless shithouses, I know I haven’t, but the same names are there, the poisonous pencil that is Jacob Rees-Mogg, and the gin-soaked sycophant Nadine Dorries. 

Anyway, these are the people that must lose their seats come hell or high water at the next general election.

Paul Bristow

James Duddridge

Nadine Dorries

Brendan Clarke-Smith

Michael Fabricant

Stephen McPartland

Marco Longhi

Andrea Jenkyns

Andrew Stephenson

Lia Nici

Chris Chope

Shaun Bailey

James Grundy

Amanda Milling

David Morris

Karl McCartney

Amanda Milling

Holly Mumbly-Croft

Peter Bone

Chris Clarkson

Trudy Harrison

Scott Benton

Mark Eastwood

Jill Mortimer

Jane Hunt

Kelly Tolhurst

Richard Drax

Philip Hollobone

Shailesh Vara

Maria Caulfield

Edward Leigh

Nigel Adams

Jacob Rees-Mogg

Ian Levy

Henry Smith

Tom Pursglove

Mark Pritchard

Jane Stevenson

Gareth Johnson

Ben Wallace

Leo Docherty

Caroline Johnson

Simon Clarke 

Bob Stewart 

Greg Smith 

Alok Sharma 

Antony Higginbotham 

John Whittingdale 

Anne-Marie Trevelyan 

David Morris 

Bill Cash 

Chris Heaton-Harris 

Priti Patel

Lee Anderson

Ben Bradley

Sarah Atherton

Nadhim Zahawi

James Cleverly

It wasn’t that long ago a massive 148 Tory MPs voted to say they had no confidence in the loathsome chancer Johnson. 

Nothing has changed. Johnson is still under investigation for his lies and he is keeping himself occupied in the US on the corporate speech circuit, at £150,000 a pop. 

We don’t need Boris Johnson, but it seems like Boris Johnson needs us to massage his ego upon command and fulfill his deep need for excessive attention. 

It’s not just Conservatives that are the problem, it is conservatism, whether that be the hard-right rent-a-gobs such as Suella Braverman or even the socially conservative (small “c”) establishment quislings such as Keir Starmer. 

It doesn’t really matter if we end up with Rishi Sunak, Boris Johnson, Penny Mordaunt or the aforementioned Labour leader, because all you will ever get is a slightly different version of a failed ideology. 

Any immediate hopes of a radical and transformative government are long gone. We will be playing damage limitation for some years to come, but today and now we have to get the Tories out of government as soon as possible. 

Whoever wins the Tory leadership election is an illegitimate Prime Minister and the Conservative party must face the most severe of punishments at the ballot box.

The people must demand a general election and bury the Conservatives once and for all. 

Until next time, 

Rachael 

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